Obituary/Solid Gone

My laptop ,3, passed away last night. Cause of death was determined to be from heat stroke. It is survived by me, it's owner, and it's younger brother, a 17" Powerbook, who is currently stationed in Baghdad, Iraq. Services will be held in my apartment on the 3rd of April. In other news, I'm leaving for New York in an hour. I'll be out of touch for a day or two.

Tetriminos

I've found the most addicting thing since double credit day on BlogMad. It's called Tetris DS, and it will eat your soul. It has six different modes so it's more than just make lines and try not to let the tetriminos (thats what the game calls them, not just blocks) get to the top of the screen. I'm working on the puzzle mode right now. The soundtrack features tunes from the classic Nintendo games. It gets pretty intense when the blocks are dropping like crazy and the music from Bowser's castle is playing. Anyway, it's a fun games, so go check it out.

T@gg3d

Tara tagged me. 1) What were you doing 10 Years Ago? I was in 9th grade. 2) 5 Years Ago? About three weeks into basic training. 3) 1 Year Ago? Obsessing about Meagan. 4) Five snacks you enjoy: - Double Stuff Oreos - Ritz Crackers - Pop Tarts - Guacamole Doritos - Sonic Blast with Oreos 5) Five songs I know by heart but wish I didn’t: - My Humps (Black Eyed Peas) - Cry Me a River (Justin Timberlake) - It's Not Unusual (Tom Jones) - Theme to "Growing Pains" (you know, the 80s family sit com) - Africa (Toto) 6) Five things I would do with a LOT of money: - Buy the hotel I worked at, fire everyone, then set the place on fire. - Buy a nice house - Have a wall of guitar amps - Pay off the fam's debt - Open a bar. 7) Five things I would never wear: - sweaters - Spandex - a thong - one of those hats with cupholders - leather 8) Five things I should never have worn: - sweaters - yellow jeans - Flannel - Turtle necks - a uniform 9) Five things I enjoy doing: - playing music - drinking - laughing at people - people watching - blogging about random stuff 10) Five bad habits: - Spending money - eating - BlogMad - Procrastinating - porn 11) Five people that must fill this out: -Meagan -Misty -Beth -you that just got here on BlogMad and actually read this far. -Jesus

Cody's Mean Post

So, I've been on this BlogMad thing a couple of days now, and I've stumbled across something that has both confused and annoyed me; weather blogs. First of all, is your life so boring you have to blog about the weather? If I'm going to be forced to look at your blog for 25 seconds, at least make the content something better than awkward chit-chat. (silence) Your blog: "So, it's kinda cold here in DC." Me: "I don't care, I don't live in DC, and I'm too busy blogging about how I put one of those blue things in my toilet tank. It got stuck underneath the flapper and I had to pull it out. Now I have Smurf finger." Your blog: "Oh." Second: Where are your credentials? See, real meteorologists are certified by the American Meteorological Society. I don't see the AMS seal. But I do see a VARB button. I also see your blog has a bunch of radar images you're pulling off some other site, and you've got a nifty chart with some text you probably just copied. Seriously, don't call yourself "The Capital's Source for Weather" if you don't have the creds, and no one comments because they're too busy for the next four digit number to pop up so they can get their credit for wasting their time on your stupid ass weather blog.

Magically Delicious

Just a quick post before I have to get on the road. I think Chocolate Lucky Charms is the best damn cereal ever. Discuss. P.S. Thanks for all the birthday shout outs yesterday.

I'm Jack Bauer

Today makes 24 years for me. Think I'll go have a quarter-life crisis later.

I got tagged.

1. Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 24 and find line 5: One-Story Home Plans: "Through the many windows in this huge." 2. Stretch your left arm out as far as you can, what do you find? The TV 3. What is the last thing you watched on TV? Some thing on ESPN about Danicka Patrick 4. With the exception of the computer, what can you hear? the tv 5. When did you last step outside? Yesterday when me and my dad were going fishing. 6. Before you started this survey, what did you look at? Blogs 7. What are you wearing? Jeans and T-Shirt 8. Did you dream last night? nope 9. When did you last laugh? I'm usually laughing at something in my head all the time. 10. What is on the walls of the room you are in? pictures and other crap 11. Seen anything weird lately? No 12. What do you think of this quiz? I'm bored 13. What is the last film you saw? Happiness 14. If you turned a multi-millionaire overnight, what would you buy? A nicer truck. 15. Tell me something about you that I don't know. I'm dynamite in bed. 16. If you could change one thing about the world, regardless of guilt and politics, what would you do? No more mosquitoes. 17. Do you like to Dance? no 18. George Bush. I told you so. 19. Imagine your first child is a girl, what do you call her? Hey, girl. 20. Imagine your boyfriend is making sweet love to his Xbox 360, what would you do? um. 21. Would you ever consider living abroad? Done it. It sucks. 22. What would you want God to say to you when you reach the pearly gates? Yeah, Hi. 23. 4 people who must also do this meme in their blog. I hate tagging other bloggers, but here goes: Meagan, Beth, Karen, Anyone else who wants to.

Socks and Sandals

Well. I've been back in the states for a few days. Still haven't done much. Visiting my dad right now. It's pretty much the same as staying at my apartment, but with cable and a bitchy woman. Seriously, I get really pissed at my stepmom. I think deep down she hates my dad. Like today he was going to get a box out of her car, so he put on his sandals over his socks. Her: Why are you wearing socks with sandals? Him: I'm just going to get the box. Her: Well it looks stupid. Me: It's easier than taking the socks off. He'll be out there for ten seconds. He isn't trying to impress anyone. Her: (Realizing I'm right) No one asked you. She's got a real "holier than thou" complex. Anyway, I've never really liked the woman, but I guess he sees something I don't. I'm going back home tomorrow. I'm going to try and go by The Oracle tomorrow since it's production night. That's my best chance to see my friend Misty and meet R. That's right, still haven't met R yet. Actually, I haven't even IMed her that much the last week. Of course, I'm busy visiting, and she's busy with some camp she's helping with. I hope it isn't some kind of cult, because that would be a deal breaker. I'm also trying to figure out a way to see Meagan. With her work and school schedule, it may be impossible. I hope not, though. Ok, back to BlogMad.

Boo, I say. Boo.

Ok, I'm not one for these "Look what's on YouTube, isn't it cute/funny/trendy/tee-hee" posts, but I gotta say, "WTF?" on this one. I guess someone is trying to get a live action Simpsons movie made. After seeing this, I'd rather not see anymore. And shouldn't Maggie be riding in the backseat?

The Suffering

I'm at my dad's right now. The grandparents showed up, too. That was an exercise in tolerance. I got about a million questions about Iraq. And I got each question asked twice. I end up just placating them because I'm sick of answering. I did manage to convince my dad to not go camping. I pretty much told him I'd been camping the last seven months and was sick of it. Chuck Norris isn't funny anymore. It's over fanboys. (He's on Yes, Dear right now, that's' where this tangent came from.) BlogMad has taken over my life. I gotta get some more fucking credits! Rate me a 10! Nicole did, and she should know good blogs. Hell, even Hammer comments on her site. Anyway, that's just a short update. Stay tuned. And vote for me, dammit.

Another Comic Post

I love it when characters make cameos in other comics. Today's Pearls Before Swine has got the kid from Baby Blues and one from Zits. I don't like the kid from Zits so I like the last frame.

Blogging on Leave: Part 1

Well, so far my time home has been fairly boring. I had dinner with my parents, went to Wal-Mart to get the essentials. Since I only brought my laptop, and iPod back from Iraq I was missing a lot of stuff a person needs. I also didn't have any of the apartment essentails either. Like food. Today has a lot of nothing, too. I went to Hot Springs to get more crap I didn't really need. Well, I bought some shoes since I'm a one pair kinda guy. And my pair is still in Iraq. Also went to the guitar store and bought a couple sets of strings. I changed the name of my blog. "Was is" was fun for a while, but I don't think it really fit me. Especailly since it was inspired by a total moron. More later.

DFW

I'm in Dallas. It sucks. I couldn't get on a standby flight. Apparently no one wanted a $200 travel voucher, a free flight an hour later, and to just be nice to a guy trying to get home. Oh well, I'm not bitter. I get to spend that hour in DFW, I got to buy some pizza, pay for WiFi, and blog about it. Looks like I came out on top after all. /sarcasm Anyway, when I get home you should all buy me a beer.

Top 'o the Mornin'

I'm in Ireland. At the airport. Waiting for the plane to get gas. It's taken a hell of a long time just to get this far, but I'll get into that in a later, longer blog. Anyway, now the only thing between me and home is the Atlantic.

Hours

I'm about to begin the journey home, so I thought I'd stop by and give a brief update. In the next two days I will visit three countries (only airport terminals, I'm afraid) and will finally be home. I pretty much don't have a plan when I get home. I'm going to improvise, except for the trip to New York, that's planned. Well, I've planned to go to New York, not planned what to do. But more on that later. Right now the only things I have left to do are get some cash, see if the PX has any Nintendo DS games left, eat, pack my backpack and get the fuck outta here. I'll try to update as I go, but I don't think I'll have much internet access. I hope my neighbors still have an unsecured wireless network I can sponge off of when I get home.

Dumbass

Man Tries to Buy Condoms With Fake $100 A 23-year-old man was arrested after he tried to buy condoms and cologne with a fake $100 bill, authorities said. Christopher Leigh Smith was charged with attempting to use a counterfeit bill to purchase the items at a Walgreens Drug Store, Florida Today reported Thursday. The clerk suspected the bill was fake and stalled Smith until police arrived, a spokeswoman for the Palm Bay Police Department said. "He told them that he knew it was fake and that he had gotten it from an unknown man," said spokeswoman Yvonne Martinez. Police found no evidence that Smith had produced the bill himself, she said. Smith is being held Brevard County Jail on a $1,000 bond. The case has also been referred to the U.S. Secret Service, which routinely handles cases involving counterfeit bills. Link

What's in a name.

While talking with R the other day it came up that I'm a sucker because I'm paying for Yahoo's premium mail service. Hey, I wanted a reason to use Thunderbird and Yahoo won't allow POP mail with out me forking over some dough. So, she hooks me up with a Gmail invite. Now this brings me to the point of the entry. I've had the same lame, boring username for the last six years. This is my chance to dump it almost for good. Well, except keeping the old one for spam and such. I began brainstorming on new ideas. How do I do that? I open iTunes, and start listening. I figure, "how better to express who I am through the words of others." Here is what I started with: PerhapsPerhapsPerhaps Easethemoment coolbluereason threeminutewarning thenewmath candleburn memorydaydreamlapses A Couple of CAKE song titles, Dishwalla songs, Liquid Tension Experiment, and OSI. I think they're good choices, but then I stumble on the winner: dissingyourdog I found this from an old Saturday Night Lives sketch. It's a parody commercial about a puppy training video that uses "verbal mockery and humiliation." That's pretty much me. If I had a dog, I would probably insult him when he did bad. It's just who I am.

The Comic Post

Last week Nicole posted a comic trying to figure out why it was funny. Now it's my turn. Only, this one is funny, kinda true, and maybe an oxymoron to us bloggers. You don't have to sift through irony, symbolism, metaphor, allusion, or poorly drawn, unfamiliar characters. It's just flat out funny.

Squash

Today was a long ass day. I spent a good chunk of it in my body armor, waiting for some tanks to give us an escort. All while surrounded by Iraqi journalists. Not my idea of a good time. Also if you ever want to have some fun, ride in a Rhino. Those are the big-ass armored Winnebegos. There were three or four times where we hit a bump, I flew out of my seat, hit my head on the roof (a good two feet above my head), and landed on my nuts. I guess that's what I get for wearing boxers, huh? The mission I went on was another "look at the Iraqi Army, aren't they competent" missions. We gave them control of a camp, and a section of Sadr City. Expect bad news from Sadr City next week. Me and the girl, we'll call her "R" since that seems to be the cool blog thing to do, started IMing this week. So far so good. She seems quirky, but down to earth. We'll see how actual face to face conversation works out in a week or two.

Preppies and Poon-Tang

Today I took my first trip into the "Red Zone." I was with some engineers who were checking out some water treatment and sewage treatment facilities. It was at the sewage plant that I had a short talk with an Iraqi kid. Now, I don't really like kids so an being an Iraqi kid, he's already got two strikes. Here is his third: "Hey, mister! Give me a pencil!" "No, I don't have a pencil." "Ok, then give me a dollar!" "No, I don't have a dollar." That's the point where I give him a dirty look and walk away. And with that conversation I've concluded this is a country filled with black haired Zack Morris's. They all have some get rich quick scam in one way or another. Some beg. Some steal. Some make bootleg DVD's. I think there are some who do legitimate work, but they are the rare exceptions. When I got back from the trip, I headed back to my room where I ran into my boss. As I told him about it, his boss walked up and I told him pretty much all the same stuff. At one point the fact I'm about to go on leave came up: "So, are you going home for leave?" "Yes, sir." "Got a wife?" "No, sir." "Girlfriend?" Now, this is the point the conversation stopped. Luckily, someone else they knew walked up and got his attention, but here is what I think his next sentence was going to be: "Well, hit a couple of bars and see if you can get yourself some pussy." I really don't think he would have said that, but the tone of his voice made me think it was about to go there. This would have been okay subject matter for some other guy who is closer to my rank and age, but this was an officer who is way older than me, so it was a little creepy. I shouldn't be surprised, though. The Army (and Air Force as in this case) is full of sleazy old men. You see, an old codger, for some reason, has to say out loud every dirty thought he has. I'm the type of guy who can keep it in. For example, here is how me and Choate, the other young guy who went to Bosnia with me, would let each other now a hot girl was nearby: "Dude," I nod at hot chick. Choate looks, looks back at me, nods in approval (or makes disgusted face and shakes head in disapproval.) End of message. I don't know. I guess I just believe in subtlety. Or at least in being classy enough to not blurt out the first Neanderthal impulse to come to me. By the way, it's more like the "Brown Zone," if you catch my drift.

Stories

Go here for the WSYR version of my story on the single mom sailor. You may have to click on the right story to view it, look for "Single mom in Iraq." Also, if you have a Mac you won't be able to watch. Go here to watch today's Freedom Journal to see my story on the MedEvac team I talked about the other day. Hopefully this one will also get a stateside re-hash. No news on the girl. Just a couple of back and forth comments on our Xanga's. Now, I gotta get some sleep.